Thirst

Today officially begins Lent. I have to confess that usually I don't give anything up for Lent because in the past it became this thing that I would give something up but then not do anything with that time, money, focus, etc... Instead of spending the time that I usually spent watching TV I would kill that time some other way and so this idea of drawing closer to God never materialized and it became just an event in my life. This year because of my desire to tell a better story, thanks Donald Miller, I stopped spending money on soda, coffee, tea, etc... and I began to just drink water when I went out. What I discovered is that I spend a ton of money on those kinds of drinks. Since January 1 I have saved somewhere in the neighborhood of $75 to $100. Now on to what is happening right now. Starting today I am drinking nothing but water until Easter. I am not drinking milk, juice, coffee at home. Nope nothing but water for the next 47 days. I write this not to draw attention to me but to say I have challenged my youth group to the same thing and for them to collect all their loose change until Easter to give to a mission project of building a well. So welcome to the 40 Day Water Only Challenge. So far I have had 15 of my teens, of my adult staff, and the entire senior pastor's family sign up. That is the coolest thing ever. If each person fills one water bottle with loose change then we have the potential of collect several hundreds of dollars. Typically this is just a check that I cut out of my budget and give to the district but this year its different. This year we change the world and we quench two kinds of thirsts. The first is the literal thirst that people feel without water. The second thirst is deeper. This thirst is in the one who has no water and the one who does. This a thirst to truly connect with God in a life changing way. This thirst can not be quenched by drinking only water. It can only be quenched when we stop and allow God to fill us. To stop being so busy that we miss the smallest thing and we take for granted even the smallest and simplest things in our lives.

God has called us to a higher standard for our lives and as we begin to truly understand this I believe that it will change who we are and push us past the point of just existing. We wont be able to just settle any more because we have seen the fullness of God and nothing else will ever be able to satisfy.

Until the water and the Blood both run freely in all...

I am outie 5000,

Robb

Voices

While I have been better at the other things I have wanted to do this next year this is one area that I have struggled with for a few reasons. The first being I am not sure how many people are going to read this and I wonder if it is worth my time. Second I want to make sure that this is more than just I did this today but something that causes me to risk and to put who I am as a real individual out there. The purpose of this blog is to show my journey with Christ and what He is showing me and how the journey is evolving and how I am evolving in my faith. I finally decided how to address those two issues. First, this is not so much about people but it is about me just sharing my heart and being open. This has to be about me being able to look back and see just what was happening in my life and to track my journey. The second issue I have not written for awhile not because God has done amazing things in my life but I just havent taken the time to share them. That is the plain and simple truth but today something happened that really spoke to me and to be honest I knew I needed to share so I can look back and remember this day.

We are entering a stage of life with Ally where she just loves to talk. Her vocabulary is growing all the time and there are times that I swear she is saying phrases or words that fit the situation but I dont think it is really clicking for her yet what it means. Typically in the mornings I drive her to her sitters house and drop her off. Our sitter doesn't live far from us so it's not that much time but there is something about that time that I cherish. In fact I long for that time with Ally. It's just me and her. Sometimes we have the radio on and if a fast song is playing we are dancing and I am singing the words and she is just talking her baby gibberish but it's our time. Other times we just sit and silence and I just look at her and I am amazed how much she has changed in the 19 months that we have had her. Then I think about how much I must have changed in the 19 months since she has been here. This time together is so sweet. It was during this drive time yesterday that God spoke to me but it was more like a realization than Him telling me something but it was powerful and life changing none the less.

It was one of those days with Ally where she was in a really silly mood. She had picked out the clothes that she wanted to wear, the coat that we typically have her wear to church she wanted to wear to Patty's. Instead of her tennis shoes she wanted her Elmo slippers. She was just being too cute. As we were driving, the radio was on but it was a fast song that we could dance and laugh too but it was just providing background noise and Ally was just talking away. She was having a full blown conversation with me that I had no clue what it was about but she did and it was so important that she share with me what she knew and had to say. As I sat there and just listened and smiled and longed to hear more from her it hit me that this is what God wants from us. He longs to just hear from us. He wants to hear our voices telling Him things and it might not come out in a way that makes sense but He still wants to hear. He looks forward to the times where we just jabber away and He can sit there and smile and laugh and look on His child with all the love that He has for them. It hit me that when I dont take Ally to the sitters, I miss that. I miss that time and my day just isn't complete without that. It's not like we drive for 30 minutes or an hour and its a forced time to get Ally to share. Its this time that she just shares with me what is going on. Her words make no sense but I love to hear her voice. God wants that from us and too often and I think He really misses it when we don't spend that time. Now I realize that we don't control God but I think because of His infinite amount of love for us, He wants to hear our voices. He wants to spend time with us and sit there and laugh at what say and do. Not in a mean spirited way but in a way that allows us to see Him delighting in us. I hate when I miss that will Ally how much more does God hate when He misses that time with us? We are His children. He wants to share in our day. He wants to turn on the radio and dance and be silly with us and to laugh as we smile and don't care if we look silly.

I realized that I am keeping from God the very thing that I hate to miss in my daughters life. I realized that not only is God missing that kind of time with me but I am missing the time that a father is able to just express His love over His child. Ally knows that I love her so much during that time. She hears it from me and I cant wait to share with those whom I am close with what happened during that morning drive or the night before at home. It's this time together although I don't fully understand her it still is exciting for me to spend the time. God wants to spend this time with us as well. He isn't going to force us into it. He isn't going to strap us into a seat and then make us talk to Him about anything and everything but He wants to hear from us. He wants to hear our voice and our words and even if what we are saying or how we are saying we don't think makes sense He wants that from us. He is not looking for us to be very proper in how we talk, He just wants us to talk. He wants to hear about the day. He wants to know how we are feeling. He wants to enjoy just hearing the sound of our voices. He is not looking for a forced conversation. In fact I wonder if He would rather have no words than words that are not spoken in a freedom of love and excitement.

How often have I stolen from Him moments that we could have shared because I didnt think He would care or I have just been lazy and not shared? How many times have I kept from Him the joy of just allowing Him to laugh at me as I am being silly in His presence because I think the time would be better spent being serious? Instead of being this beautiful thing that just flows because of relationship, I fear I have caused it to become this time of forced, uncomfortable conversation that He hears and responds to because He has promised He will be there but it could be so much more. Simply two voices sharing in a conversation with laughter and excitement and joy that the other is just there.

I am outie 5000,

Robb

Everything Changes.

It's hard to believe that the year is almost over. In just a few short hours we will be ringing in not just a new year but a new decade. So much has happened in my journey the past few months and I have not taken the time to update but I am hoping to change that over this next year and I hope for anyone who actually reads this that God would speak to them some how. If it's just me writing then this will be a great place to put my thoughts and God can speak to me.

As the title suggests this next year everything changes. Because the past few months have been so challenging I am tired of just having a story that is there but I am ready to change my story and what happens in it. The first thing that is changing is what I am doing with my life. I am not leaving the ministry, I am not changing churches but I am going to be about something different. I am doing everything I can to bring attention to the issue of clean drinking water around the world and an organization I have joined called the Haiti Water Project. I just sent them a blog entry and it can be found at Haiti Water Project sometime in the future. Here is what I posted:

Why did I join the Haiti Water Project Cause on Facebook? And why have I been adamant about getting my teens and family to join as well? Those are a couple of questions that I have been asked by a few people close to me over the past couple of weeks and the answer is simple; God. In the past couple of months I felt God stirring me to do something more and to be part of something bigger than just my little world here in Carthage, MO. I had seen the stats in the past knew how much money it would take to provide clean drinking water to the world and it seemed to be a staggering number but one that we as Christians should and could do something about.

Right before the Advent season I was introduced to the Advent Conspiracy watched one of their videos and saw how much we will spend on Christmas this year and it literally hurt. I couldn't sleep or eat or get that number out of my head. At this time I was starting a series with my teens called "Storyline" and how to change their story. I was getting ready to talk about changing their plot and how if they would change their plot what they are about, what was happening it would change everything and in the message I was going to challenge them to discover a cause to get behind. I could not write the message. Here I was telling my teens that they needed to do something for the Kingdom of God to be a Christ follower who was not satisfied with just going to church and existing and I wasn't doing anything. As I began praying about what I should do, God brought back to mind water and the fact that more people die every day from lack of clean drinking water. How can they ever hear about the love of God if they die of lack of water before they ever get the chance? That did it. I decided that I was going to change at least one person's life in a very simple way and so I determined that I am going to make a very concentrated effort to raise as much money in 2010 for clean water.

So that evening I talked about changing their plot and then I shared with them what God had pressed on me to do and to hold myself accountable I told them my plan and invited them to join me. For the next year I am drinking water. That may not sound like much but instead of going out and spending money on soda, coffee, tea I am going to take that money and put it aside for clean water. When we go grocery shopping instead of buying cases of soda at $10 every couple of weeks I am putting that money in the bucket. If I order something other than water I have to put the exact same amount of money in the bucket. That might not sound like much but I truly believe that it will add up quickly and as I encourage my family and teens to join me I expect God to great things with what I am able to give.

I found Haiti Water Project through a very good pastor friend who had joined and donated his birthday to that cause in effort to raise money. I decided that this was the organization that I needed to partner with and give not just finances but my energy, time and attention to. I joined and then went about inviting my family, teens and volunteer staff to this cause. I am excited to see what happens in the lives of those that my money will go to help. I am excited to see how God challenges my teens to serve Him even more as they see their youth pastor sacrifice something so small and insignificant here so that someone can have something as simple as clean water to drink.

I plan on updating here how things are going and excited to see what I can do through the next year to help provide clean drinking water.

Some other things that I really want to do this next year are:

-Read at least one (1) book per week

Review and blog monthly what books I have read

-Blog at least once a week

-Lose 30 pounds

-Run a half marathon

-Draw closer to Christ and His plan for my life

-Raise as much money as possible for Haiti Water Project

-Expose my teens to the limitless love and power of God and see their lives transformed

-Minister better to the whole church

-Be a better husband and father as the spiritual leader in my home

Some of this has no real spiritual impact but I am excited about what this next year looks like. Besides I want some way of holding myself accountable, and hopefully this will be a great way to do that.

I am outie 5000,

Robb

We've Reached The End

Well, the craziness of summer has finally come to a conclusion as we finished up our Mission Trip this past weekend. It's hard to believe that 3 months worth of events and activities have come to an end. As much fun as it was, there is part of me that is relieved that it is done so that I can recoup and get ready for the fall. Doing something new this year and that is taking the entire month of August off for Wednesday evening services. While it might sound weird I am hoping that it does a few things. The first that it recharges those who put so much into it, the adult leaders. Second that it allows me to really prepare for a great kick-off in September. Third that we give the teens something to get excited about and looking forward to what is going to come.

On a personal note it has been a very interesting summer as God has been speaking by not speaking if that makes sense. He caused a great deal of questioning, seeking and unsatisfaction in my life and then let me linger without providing direction or answers to what I was asking. While this could be seen as very frustrating, and at times it really was, it has created a greater reliance on Him as I continually seek His face and the answers have yet to come. What this has done more often has created an excitement of what God has in store for me, for my family and for the ministry that He has called me too. Not sure where He is guiding me but I know that it will be a great journey. I will make sure that for the very few who ever read this that I keep you updated on my journey as it continues to evolve. Until then...

I am outie 5000,

Robb

I've Got Style

As I continue to read in Isaiah, it continues to amaze me. I have to be honest in saying that this is the first time in my life that I have spent this kind of time in one section of the Bible. Typically I would read and continue to move to the next chapter and I might spend a couple of days on the same passage but to spend over a month of just a few chapters has been an incredible thing. This past Saturday I added chapter 58 to my study and the timing of the subject matter could not have been better. Chapter 58 talks about fasting and the kind of fasting that the Lord desires. Recently I talked to the teens about really praying for the youth ministry and to look for those who were missing and let them know that they were missed, to invite their friends to church, to really look to change our group and to start with prayer. In staff meeting this same approach is being done in challenging our people to pray in June, connect in July and serve in August. So with all that being explain let's move on to what God shared with me on Saturday as I sat at a scenic overlook read my Bible and was amazed and worshipped in God's amazing creation of the beautiful Ozark mountains.

In chapter 58 Isaiah is sharing this message from God about the people fasting and praying and what was happening as they did. They were fasting and praying yet there was no change in how they were living their lives. They still took advantage of their workers and had this air of because I am fasting and praying I deserve God to hear me and give me what I seek. In fact 58:4b says, "You cannot fast as you do today and expect your voice to be heard on high." WOW!! What an incredible statement. So that got me thinking. Fasting and prayer are acts of worship. It's giving up of self to see God glorified. Worship is something that we as humans and especially children of God were created to do. So often we get into these worship wars over style of worship. Traditional, contemporary, liturgical. Praise choruses, hymns, no music, lots of music, chanting, etc, etc, etc... As I read this chapter it began to dawn on me that there are two styles of worship but it is not what we think it is.

Style 1. It is worship where it's all about us. We are not truly worshipping God. We arent allowing the glory to go to Him. We aren't changing the world we live in through worship. We are doing it more out of habit or to put on a show. This style of worship is heartless, passionless, and selfish. The goal is to look good or be comfortable in what we do. We pray the same prayers, we sing the same songs, we go through the motions without ever stopping to consider what needs to be happening in and through our worship. That is style 1 and according to 58:4 we think God hears it and is moved by it?

Style 2. It is worship that is all about Him. We begin by truly putting the Lord of Lords before everything else and we lift up all glory to Him because it is truly due to Him and Him alone. When we worship the way He has instructed us to the world is changed. In 58:6-14 it goes on to explain what will happen when we truly fast and pray and worship. Change comes to the world. The chains of injustice are loosened. The oppressed are set free. The hungry eat. The poor are housed. The naked are clothed. The family is restored. And God hears our cries. This style is one that is defined by a heartfelt, passionate, selfless pursuit of the face of God. Not for what He can give to us but because we long to seek His face. Nothing else matters but the things of God and if something is bothering God it bothers us. Regardless of the song we sing or dont sing. Regardless of the type of music. This is a lifestyle that is comfortable worshipping because it is what we do daily. This is style number 2 and God is deserved of this and this alone.

So there is a style war going on in the church. But it is not over the type of music. If the war becomes about this then it has become style one and both "sides" are wrong. But if worship stays in style 2 where God is glorified the type of music wont matter. It doesnt matter what songs we sing. We could sing twinkle twinkle little star and because our heart is so consumed by the things of God we would become lost in worship. Certainly there are preferences and that is fine. I prefer one style of music over another. I prefer certain things. The problem is when our preferences become more important than who it is all about. When we prefer one thing over another and so because of that we "can't" worship. We should be able to worship in all things. We are called to be a people of worship and to live in a style of worship that transforms our lives as well as our world. Worship should no longer be focused on the song style but on the giver of the song. Scripture tells us that there is "nothing new under the sun." That means every song that we sing has been sung for eternity already. The angels have been rejoicing God with praise choruses, hymns, chants, etc... since they were created and so there is no "new" worship songs. This idea that one type of music has a "holier" meaning is lost. In now way is this meant to bash what some would call traditional or contemporary because there are those on both sides who think the same way. They think and spout off that their style is true worship and that the other is not. When really both are worship its the state of the heart that determines the style.

My hope and prayer is that whoever reads this blog would be challenged to look beyond the type of music and to see which of the real style of worship they are about. This worship war over style has much more eternal implications than the "war" we tend to focus on in church. When we fight the traditional worship war over "styles" unfortunately both sides have already lost and Christ is not the focus the type of music becomes what is being worshipped. Great hymns become meaningless in God's ears. Great choruses fall flat and don't reach the altar of sacrifice. It's fine to have preferences. It's those differences that allow us to paint such an incredible tapestry of worship that is beautiful because of the differences. Just don't let those preferences become the object of worship. Well until next time,

I am outie 5000,

Robb